When Chuck Norris puts toast in the toaster it comes out bread.
Suicide committed Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can play volleyball with a bowlingball.
Chuck Norris jumped the grand canyon...longways
Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse and that is how the giraffe was created.
Stars wish upon Chuck Norris.
No man can perfectly predict the weather, not even Chuck Norris.
But the weather DOES try to predict what kind of day Chuck would like to have...
Chuck Norris is the most feared predator on the planet.
That's why sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
Chuck Norris doesn't cry.
His eyes sweat.
In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."