The sandman puts other people to sleep but Chuck Norris put the sandman to sleep.
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Chuck Norris never actually roundhouse kicks anyone, the world just spins underneath him when he lifts his legs.
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The reason Tom Cruise runs in all his movies is because he's running the hell away from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can access the internet from a walkie talkie.
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Earth is not spinning around the sun.
The sun is just desperately trying to keep a distance to Chuck Norris.
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Once, on the set of Walker Texas Ranger, a goat fell over dead.
Chuck Norris ran up to the goat and beard rubbed it back to life.
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It takes a master to shoot a fly from a hundred Paces, but it takes a Chuck Norris to roundhouse-kick one from a thousand.
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Chuck Norris' phone never auto corrects him.
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Chuck Norris’ house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
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Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday.
Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
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