When Chuck Norris touched a Prius, it turned into a Ferrari
Mess with Chuck Norris, you get roundhouse kicked.
What time is it when Chuck Norris knocks on your door? Too Late!
Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.
When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
Chuck Norris invented 1080p so people could see his beard is made of razor wire.
A bulletproof vest wears Chuck Norris for protection.
Chuck Norris once gave a man the Hiemlich Manuever. That man still holds the record for most bones broken.
Chuck Norris has found what U2 are looking for.