Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies dead.
CNN tells about every disaster around the world. CNN is actually Chuck Norris News.
Chuck Norris has never taken a test, because no one questions Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an attitude. He has a personality you can't handle.
When Chuck Norris goes to out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a chin under his beard just another fist!
Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
People created the automobile to escape from Chuck Norris... Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris created the automobile accident.