Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter.
He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
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For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one.
For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
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People created the automobile to escape from Chuck Norris...
Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris created the automobile accident.
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Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate Xmas, Xmas celebrates Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't always drink beer, but when he does he has the dos equis guy serve it to him in a dress.
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Chuck Norris grew a beard at the age of eighteen.
Twice.
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Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
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Chuck Norris eats rainbows to taste the Skittles.
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Chuck Norris can make sounds come out on his Air Guitar.
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When Chuck Norris touched a Prius, it turned into a Ferrari
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