Chuck Norris Avenged the Avengers.
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The Yeti can't be found because it Chuck Norris made sure no one ever finds it.
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Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick me for being stupid.
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A bulletproof jacket is an imitation of Chuck Norris' beard.
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Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys.
The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore.
The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out."
The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth."
Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
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The only reason you woke up this morning is because Chuck Norris allowed you too.
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When Chuck Norris runs backwards during a fight, it may seem like he's retreating.
He's not. He's just attacking from another direction.
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Chuck Norris is so tough, that he doesn't get a workout from the weights,they get a workout from him.
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Total Recall was based off of an average day in the life of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris bought out the Walt Disney Company with a car-wash token.
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