Chuck Norris wins every political campaign, but politely declines the jobs.
In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.
A company once tried to make Chuck Norris toilet paper, but they soon realized it wouldn't work because Chuck Norris won't take shit from anyone.
Chuck Norris goes to the Bermuda Triangle for vacation.
Chuck Norris can unlock a hairpin with a door.
Chuck Norris uses paper to cut scissors.
There's a medical term for those who willingly defy Chuck Norris... organ donors.
When Chuck Norris plays sudoku, he can put two same numbers in one square and still solve it right.
Yo mamma so ugly she scares Chuck Norris!
According to leading scientists, the deadliest animal on the planet is the Bearded Norris.