The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris does not need pressure cookers. The food cooks itself out of pressure.
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has 37.97 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris reached level 51 on Oblivion.
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has 37.97 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, game
Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life. When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
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has 37.97 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, fitness, life
Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
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has 37.93 % from 86 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
The speed of light was instituted because Chuck Norris didn't want get winded outrunning it. Chuck Norris hates to sweat.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, science
Chuck Norris can get satellite cable from a Skoal can.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, technology
Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris's urine was the main ingredient for balco's designer steroids. Therefore, Chuck Norris is actually the all-time single-season home run king.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Reading Chuck Norris Facts is the same as learning history.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, history
World War II started because Burger King screwed up Chuck Norris' order. Today Burger King NEVER gives you onions unless you ask for them.
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, war
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