The best customer service jokes

The irate customer calling the newspaper offices, loudly demanded to know where her Sunday edition was. "Ma'am", said the employee, "today is Saturday. The Sunday paper is not delivered 'til Sunday." There was quite a pause on the other end of the phone, followed by a ray of recognition. "So that's why no one was in church today."
Vote: has 78.77 % from 32 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: church, customer service, old people, phone
I sent a reminder to a client that it was time to visit the eye doctor. He called back to inform me that he would not be coming in because, as he put it, "I have a new obstetrician."
Vote: has 78.59 % from 18 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: customer service, doctor, phone, time
A woman called our airline customer-service desk asking if she could take her dog on board. "Sure," I said, "as long as you provide your own kennel." I further explained that the kennel needed to be large enough for the dog to stand up, sit down, turn around, and roll over. The customer was flummoxed: "I'll never be able to teach him all of that by tomorrow!"
Vote: has 78.47 % from 44 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: airplane, communication, customer service, dog, stupid
When asked for his name by the coffee shop clerk, my brother-in-law answered, "Marc, with a C." Minutes later, he was handed his coffee with his name written on the side: Cark.
Vote: has 77.50 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, customer service, family, stupid
I spotted several pairs of men's Levi's at a garage sale. They were sizes 30, 31, and 32, but I was looking for size 33. So I asked the owner if he had a pair. He shook his head. "I'm still wearing the 33s," he said. "Come back next year."
Vote: has 76.80 % from 29 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, customer service, fat, time
At an art gallery, a woman and her ten-year-old son were having a tough time choosing between one of my paintings and another artist's work. They finally went with mine. "I guess you decided you prefer an autumn scene to a floral," I said. "No," said the boy. "Your painting's wider, so it'll cover three holes in our wall."
Vote: has 76.06 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: customer service, kids
A passenger piled his luggage on the scale at an airline counter in New York and said to the ticket agent: "I'm flying to Los Angeles. I want the large bag sent to Denver and the two small ones to Cincinnati." "I'm sorry sir, but we can't do that," said the ticket agent. "That's good to hear because that's where they ended up the last time I flew this route."
Vote: has 75.97 % from 22 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: airplane, customer service, geography, travel
A customer walked into our store looking for Christmas lights. I showed her our top brand, but, wanting to make sure each bulb worked, she asked me to take them out of the box and plug them in. I did, and each one lit up. "Great," she said. I carefully placed the string of lights back in the box. But as I handed them to her, she looked alarmed. "I don't want this box," she said abruptly. "It's been opened."
Vote: has 74.97 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Christmas, customer service, mean, technology
While we were working at a men's clothing store, a customer asked my coworker to help her pick out a tie that would make her husband's blue eyes stand out. "Ma'am," he explained, "any tie will make blue eyes stand out if you tie it tight enough."
Vote: has 74.21 % from 31 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: beauty, black humor, customer service, death, work
Christian Doctor: "Your recovery was a miracle!" Christian Patient: "Thank God! Now I don't have to pay you."
Vote: has 73.56 % from 40 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: christian, customer service, doctor, money