The best customer service jokes

A passenger piled his luggage on the scale at an airline counter in New York and said to the ticket agent: "I'm flying to Los Angeles. I want the large bag sent to Denver and the two small ones to Cincinnati." "I'm sorry sir, but we can't do that," said the ticket agent. "That's good to hear because that's where they ended up the last time I flew this route."
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has 79.27 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: airplane, customer service, geography, travel
A customer comes into the computer store. I'm looking for a mystery Adventure Game with lots of graphics. You know, something really challenging." "Well," replied the clerk, "Have you tried Vista?"
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has 78.77 % from 152 votes. More jokes about: computer, customer service, game, IT
At an art gallery, a woman and her ten-year-old son were having a tough time choosing between one of my paintings and another artist's work. They finally went with mine. "I guess you decided you prefer an autumn scene to a floral," I said. "No," said the boy. "Your painting's wider, so it'll cover three holes in our wall."
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has 78.15 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: customer service, kids
The irate customer calling the newspaper offices, loudly demanded to know where her Sunday edition was. "Ma'am", said the employee, "today is Saturday. The Sunday paper is not delivered 'til Sunday." There was quite a pause on the other end of the phone, followed by a ray of recognition. "So that's why no one was in church today."
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has 78.03 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: church, customer service, old people, phone
A customer walked into our store looking for Christmas lights. I showed her our top brand, but, wanting to make sure each bulb worked, she asked me to take them out of the box and plug them in. I did, and each one lit up. "Great," she said. I carefully placed the string of lights back in the box. But as I handed them to her, she looked alarmed. "I don't want this box," she said abruptly. "It's been opened."
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has 76.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, customer service, mean, technology
I spotted several pairs of men's Levi's at a garage sale. They were sizes 30, 31, and 32, but I was looking for size 33. So I asked the owner if he had a pair. He shook his head. "I'm still wearing the 33s," he said. "Come back next year."
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has 76.89 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, fat, time
Customer to Waiter: "This is the third time I'm asking you, do you serve pigs in here?!" Waiter: "Sir Please sit down, this is the 100th time I telling you, we serve everyone here."
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has 76.54 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, food, mean, vulgar
At the clothing store where I work, I make it a point of pride to give customers my unvarnished opinion. One day, when a man emerged from the fitting room, I took one look at him and shook my head. "No, no," I said. "Those jeans look terrible on you. I'll go get you another pair." As I walked away, I heard him mumble, "I was trying on the shirt."
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has 75.27 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: beauty, business, communication, customer service, mean
An aching back sent me stumbling to the drugstore for relief. After a search, I found what I was looking for: a selection of heating pads specifically for people with back pain—all on the bottom shelf.
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has 75.27 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: customer service, health, mean
I sent a reminder to a client that it was time to visit the eye doctor. He called back to inform me that he would not be coming in because, as he put it, "I have a new obstetrician."
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has 74.97 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: customer service, doctor, phone, time