The best disgusting jokes

Q: Why did the referee stop the leper hockey game? A: There was a face-off in the corner.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
A couple walked into the supermarket. They looked confused, so a clerk walked up to them and asked them what they wanted. The couple asked for a couple of lottery tickets. He gave the tickets to them, and they paid for them. The husband looked confused again. He asked the clerk, “What the hell do I do with these damn things?” The clerk replied, “Well, you're supposed to scratch the box and see if you've won anything.” The wife looked disgusted. "Oh please," she muttered. "What?" asked the clerk. "Oh nothing," she answered, "it's just that, well, he's been scratching down there for years, and he ain't won a damn thing."
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, husband
Q: What is worse than ten dead people in one trashcan? A: One dead person in ten trashcans!
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: death, disgusting
Q: What compliment do you NOT want from a midget? A: Wow! Your hair smells good!
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
What's worse than 11 dead babies stapled to a tree? 1 dead baby stapled to 11 trees.
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has 54.33 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: dead baby, disgusting, morbid
A man visits his aunt in the nursing home. It turns out that she is taking a nap, so he just sits down in a chair in her room, flips through a few magazines, and munches on some peanuts sitting in a bowl on the table. Eventually, the aunt wakes up, and her nephew realizes he’s absentmindedly finished the entire bowl of peanuts. "I’m so sorry, auntie, I’ve eaten all of your peanuts!" "That’s okay, dearie," the aunt replied. "After I’ve sucked the chocolate off, I don’t care for them anyway."
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has 54.31 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: chocolate, disgusting, family, food
Q: Why did Captain Kirk piss on the roof of the Enterprise? A: To boldly go where no man has gone before.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, disgusting
Friend 1: "I like my women how I like my milk." Friend 2: "What? White?" Friend 1: "No, expired."
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has 54.20 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, friendship, white people, wife
Three men walk into a bar. The barman tells them, "If you can sit in my basement for a day, I'll give you free beer forever." The first man walks out after five minutes and says, "It's impossible, you got a swarm of flies in there." So the second man tries his luck, but can't take more than an hour. Finally, the third man goes down. When he returns a day later, the others ask him how he did it. He says, "Easy! I took a dump in one corner and sat in the other corner!"
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has 54.17 % from 108 votes. More jokes about: bar, bartender, beer, disgusting
There once was a girl named Suzy Brown Said no one could lay her down. Over the hill came Piss Paul Pete, With forty pounds of swinging meat. He took her in the long tall grass, Shoved his dick right up her ass. Then she blew one gnarly fart, Blew his ball two feet apart. Over the hill went Piss Paul Pete, With forty pounds of shredded meat.
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has 54.15 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart
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