The best IT jokes

Bill Gates died in a car accident. He found himself in Purgatory being sized up by God… “Well, Bill, I’m really confused on this call. I’m not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world and yet you created that ghastly Windows 95. I’m going to do something I’ve never done before. In your case, I’m going to let you decide where you want to go!” Bill replied, “Well, thanks, God. What’s the difference between the two?” God said, “I’m willing to let you visit both places briefly if it will help you make a decision.” “Fine, but where should I go first?” God said, “I’m going to leave that up to you.” Bill said, “OK, then, let’s try Hell first.” So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters. There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining and the temperature was perfect. Bill was very pleased. “This is great!” he told God, “If this is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!” “Fine,” said God and off they went. Heaven was a high place in the clouds, with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice but not as enticing as Hell. Bill thought for a quick minute and rendered his decision. “Hmm, I think I prefer Hell” he told God. “Fine,” retorted God, “as you desire.” So Bill Gates went to Hell. Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When God arrived in Hell, he found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming amongst the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons. “How’s everything going, Bill?” God asked. Bill responded – his voice full of anguish and disappointment, “This is awful, this is not what I expected. I can’t believe this happened. What happened to that other place with the beaches and the beautiful women playing in the water?” God says, “That was the screen saver”.
has 45.68 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: car, celebrity, death, god, IT
What is the other name for the ‘Intel Inside?' "The warning label." {Intel inside.......fool is outside}.
has 45.29 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: IT
Why did Steve Jobs live his last moments in regret? They say your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. Unfortunately for Steve Jobs, his iPhone 4S didn't have a Flash player installed!
has 45.29 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, death, IT, life, phone
No statement can catch the ChuckNorrisException.
has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, coding, computer, geek, IT
What happens if you download the Princess Diana screensaver application? Your iphone will keep crashing!
has 44.49 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, dirty, IT, phone
What do Scientists have for snacks? Micro-chips.
has 44.46 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: IT, science
Q: What is height of Craziness? A: Getting a blank paper Xeroxed.
has 44.46 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: IT
Someone calls at the hotline: Good evening. I’ve just installed Windows 98... So? Wheel I have a problem... Ok, ok, you just said that...
has 44.13 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: IT, phone
Chuck Norris can access the internet from a walkie talkie.
has 44.13 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, IT
Two bloggers chatting: Mom: Son, it’s snowing so nice. Son: Where, Give me the link please.
has 43.61 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: IT
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