Why was the IT support worker bad-tempered?
Because he had a chip on his shoulder.
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Only Chuck Norris can dislike on Facebook.
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A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed.
The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain.
They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane.
They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt.
The physicist said "We need to model the friction in the brake pads and the resultant temperature rise, see if we can work out why they failed".
The engineer said "I think I've got a few spanners in the back. I'll take a look and see if I can work out what's wrong".
The programmer said "Why don't we get going again and see if it's reproducible?"
Womens are like computer virus...
they ENTER your life...
SEARCH your pocket...
SHIFT your balance ...
CONTROL your life...
when you become an old version DELET you from the system
What do you get when you cross an apple with a nun?
A computer that won’t go down.
How many computer programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
Are you kidding?
That’s a hardware problem!
What do you call a computer that takes 15 minutes to start, freezes if you try to do more than one thing at a time, crashes regularly and causes you to swear under your breath throughout the day?
Cutting edge.
Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.
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Where's the best place to hide a body?
Page two of Google.