Why was the IT support worker bad-tempered?
Because he had a chip on his shoulder.
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Have you heard about the Viagra computer virus?
It turns your 3 1/2 inch floppy into a hard disk.
Bill Gates and Jim Cannavino from IBM are arguing about the future of 32-bit operating systems.
They decide to throw a coin.
Cannavino: "If the number is up, OS/2 will be the new standard, if it’s head Windows95 will be the new standard."
Gates: "Hey, you forgot Windows NT."
Cannavino: "No, I didn’t. If the coin falls on end, Windows NT will be the future."
What's an extroverted IT professional?
One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you, instead of his own.
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If I wanted a warm fuzzy feeling, I'd antialias my graphics!
How many computer programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
Are you kidding?
That’s a hardware problem!
Womens are like computer virus...
they ENTER your life...
SEARCH your pocket...
SHIFT your balance ...
CONTROL your life...
when you become an old version DELET you from the system
Girlfriend pregnant error... Abort, Marry, Ignore?
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define "Great" he said,
"I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
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