A project manager, a computer programmer and a computer operator are driving down the road when the car they are in gets a flat tire. The three men try to solve the problem. The project manager said: "Let's catch a cab and in ten minutes we'll reach our destination." The computer programmer said: "We have here the driver's guide. I can easily replace the flat tire and continue our drive." The computer operator said: "First of all, let's turn off the engine and turn it on again. Maybe it will fix the problem." Suddenly a Microsoft software engineer passed by and said: "Try to close all windows, get off the car, and then get in and try again."
Someday, the people who know how to use computers will rule over those who don’t. And there will be a special name for them – secretaries.
An internet maniac boy asks his father: Daddy, why do we have five fingers if the mouse has only two buttons?
Chuck Norris gave Black Ops a thumbs up and people at Microsoft a roundhouse kick in the face. Suck it Microsoft.
Fed up with your computer winning at chess? Try it at kick-boxing instead!
I’ve got one those special filter programmes on my Internet access. It’s really handy, it blocks out everything except porn sites.
You realize that you are dependent of the internet when: You forget in what year you are. You get out from you’re room and you discover that you’re parent moved and you don’t even know when that happened. You dream only of quick connections. You open you’re interphone when you get out from you’re room so you can hear when you get an e-mail.
How come the women loves the PC? It’s easier to turn on!
A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
Linux is like a wigwam: no windows, no gates, apache inside...