Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
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If Chuck Norris were an Adam's Apple, he'd be in your throat right now.
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Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
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When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged.
He holds up the phone and money falls out.
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Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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People sell their souls to the devil.
The devil sells his soul to Chuck Norris.
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Alien from "A.V.P" is just Chuck Norris' Gecko.
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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
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When Chuck Norris says "Jump", you don't say, "How high?" - you say, "When do I come down?"
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Chuck Norris actually went to Rome by all roads. At the same time.
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Chuck Norris lives in a Roundhouse...
And his favorite drink is punch...
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