Chuck Norris' first words were... "Chuck Norris".
Two things in life are certain: Death and a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris.
Only Chuck Norris can cross the "Beyond" section of Bed, Bath and Beyond store.
Chuck Norris has never taken a test, because no one questions Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris puts toast in the toaster it comes out bread.
When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.
Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
When a Jedi dies they become part of the force, when the force dies it becomes part of Chuck Norris.
The dinosaurs aren't extinct. They're just hiding from Chuck Norris.
Charlie Sheen winning? Chuck Norris says "I think not."
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.