Chuck Norris does his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
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Chuck Norris once threw a pebble.
We now call it...Hayley's Comet.
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Not even Houdini can escape from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris' muscles are so developed that he's had intellectual conversations with them.
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Chuck Norris wears sunglasses not to protect his eyes from the sun, but to protect the sun from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris walked right into Area 51, bought a Snapple, and walked out.
No one dared to move.
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If Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks you, even Google won't be able to find you.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use a coffee maker, he puts the coffee beans in his mouth and boils them with his rage.
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Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats.
Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
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In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris.
The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.
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Chuck Norris once scored a field goal, using a hockey stick!
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