Chuck Norris does his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
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Chuck Norris is the only weapon allowed through airport security
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The Terminator said, "I'll be back" because he saw Chuck Norris was coming.
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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Chuck Norris once ate four 30lb bowling balls without chewing.
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Chuck Norris flosses with dynamite wick.
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When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
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According to leading scientists, the deadliest animal on the planet is the Bearded Norris.
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Chuck Norris once starred in Wheel of Fortune.
The last twenty nine minutes were spent in an awkward silence, waiting for the wheel to stop spinning.
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A lion once put his head inside the mouth of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris' primary weapon in Call of Duty is his roundhouse kick.
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