Chuck Norris walked right into Area 51, bought a Snapple, and walked out.
No one dared to move.
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Chuck Norris can make love to a girl so hard and fast it inspired a reality tv series.
We know it as Forged in the fire.
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When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat.
His body cries.
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When Chuck Norris goes to the cinema, he changes the movies with his remote control.
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Chuck Norris can hear his phone ring on silent.
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Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
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Chuck Norris once strangled a man with the mans own eyelash.
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Christano Roanaldo dives because he thinks of Chuck Norris.
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Q: Why is Chuck Norris still alive?
A: Death remembers the feeling of the round-house kick.
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Chuck Norris can drive a car without gas... or an engine.
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When Teddy Rosavelt said there is nothing to fear but fear itself he obiously hadn't met Chuck Norris.
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