Chuck Norris walked right into Area 51, bought a Snapple, and walked out.
No one dared to move.
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Chuck Norris does not listen to lectures.
Lectures listen to Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris was here in the Philippines, there would be no hostage crisis.
He eats hostage-takers for breakfast!
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Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris is the only person who could truly judge a book by its' cover.
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Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his monther's womb.
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When Chuck Norris has your back you aren't likely to get it back again.
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Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
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Chuck Norris dosn't need a gun, he points an says pow!
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Chuck Norris can strum your pain with his fingers, tell your whole life with his words – but mainly just kill you softly with his song.
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Chuck Norris can make sounds come out on his Air Guitar.
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