Chuck Norris blows out trick candles.
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Ozzy Osbourne once accidentally bit the head off a live bat - Chuck Norris once deliberately bit the head off a live pterodactyl.
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Chuck Norris' pager is still cool.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
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Chuck Norris can make a snowman with sand.
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Chuck Norris is the only one who has a silver goldfish.
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The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.
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Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday.
Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need twitter, he's already following you.
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Chuck Norris shot a man to death with an unloaded nerf gun.
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James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator.
However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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