Chuck Norris is so hot he makes the sun sweat.
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A blind man ran into Chuck Norris and got his sight back.
Unfortunately, the first and last thing he saw was a roundhouse kick to the face.
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Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
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The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
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Chuck Norris bit a spider once then it became Spiderman!
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A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are:
1. Heart disease
2. Chuck Norris
3. Cancer
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No sense in playing Clue with Chuck Norris, we know it was Chuck Norris with a roundhouse kick in any room.
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Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
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Chuck Norris "Caught 'Em All " twice.
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Uri Geller bends spoons with his mind, Chuck Norris bends minds with a spoon.
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Chuck Norris knows the last number of infinity.
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