Chuck Norris is not impressed with your facts...
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The only sure things are Death and Taxes…and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
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Chuck Norris said "come on" and "on" came.
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Chuck Norris doesn't push someone out of the way of a car, he pushes the car out of the way of the person.
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Chuck Norris was hungry so he went to eat a hotdog.
When he saw it giggled and said: "What a bad luck! Look what a part of a dog I've to eat!"
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The Earth does NOT revolve around the Sun.
The Earth is stationary.
The Sun follows Chuck Norris as he makes his daily jog around the Earth.
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Everyone knows the speed of light...
Chuck Norris knows the speed of darkness.
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During vacation my front door's open and I left a note saying "This house is protected by Chuck Norris 3 days a week you guess which 3."
All was good.
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Chuck Norris once spelled the entire alphabet using only M&Ms.
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After meeting with Chuck Norris' lawyer the UFC have changed their name from "Ultimate Fighting Championship" to simply "Fighting Championship."
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Don King once had straight hair, until that day he saw Chuck Norris' eyes staring him down.
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