Chuck Norris wears boots to protect the Earth from his feet.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
Chuck Norris was in all the Star Wars movies, he played the force.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
Chuck Norris can tie your hands behind your back with both hands tied behind his back.
I had an idea once, and a light bulb appeared over my head. Chuck Norris had an idea, and the sun was created.
Chuck Norris got a perfect SAT score by just putting his name on the paper...
Chuck Norris puts phone companies on hold.
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
Chuck Norris doesn't use his hand to catch bullets, he uses his mind.