For Chuch Norris, ANYTHING counts in horseshoes and handgrenades.
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Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.
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Chuck Norris won the Kentucky derby, on a Unicorn.
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Chuck Norris keeps a list of all his victims, it's called the phone book.
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Jesus is the son of God.
God is the son of Chuck Norris.
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The Reapers in the Mass Effect series were actually Chuck Norris' baby toys.
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Chuck Norris is the reason Pluto is no longer a planet.
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If you look back far enough in your family tree, Chuck Norris appears at least three times.
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Chuck Norris used to be a soccer referee.
He lost the job after giving penalties to the players: Death Penalty.
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Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares.
Actually he can also blow your face.
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Chuck Norris injected his blood into a monkey, a fish, and a lizard.
They are now known as King Kong, Jaws, and Godzilla.
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