Chuck Norris uses black holes to clean his dishes.
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Chuck Norris got a homerun in bowling.
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Only Chuck Norris knows a bigger number than infinity, and it's not infinite plus one.
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Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer.
Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
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The earth doesn't revolve around the sun.
It's the sun that revolves around Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold.
Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.
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Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy were all real at one time... then they met Chuck.
There can only be 1 living legend.
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James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator.
However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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Chuck Norris has heard the actual voice of Charlie Brown's teacher...
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Chuck Norris once played with Legos.
The result was The Great Pyramids.
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Chuck Norris doesn't check the time - he decides it.
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