Joke #10817

Chuck Norris uses black holes to clean his dishes.

If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.

Sliced bread is the best thing since Chuck Norris.

In the Matrix, the bullets try to dodge Chuck Norris - and fail.

Chuck Norris can skip a track on a cassette.

Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and as he enters, notices a horse and the end of the bar with a sign on it. Out of curiosity, he approaches the bartender and asks what the deal is with the horse at the end of the bar. The bartender tells him: "The sign says if you can make the horse laugh you'll win $50. Take note though that hundreds of people have tried and no-one has been able to do it." "Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back." So he walks to the end of the bar, whispers something into the horse's ear, and within seconds the horse is laughing hysterically. "That's amazing," said the bartender. "Tell you what, if you can make him cry I'll double your winnings." "Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back." So Chuck walked again over to the horse, came back to the bartender 2 minutes later, and the horse was balling and sobbing like a baby. "Well," replied Chuck Norris, "First I told him a had a bigger d*ck than he did. Then I showed him."

Chuck Norris' tears would save lives, if he'd cry.

Chuck Norris sleeps until he tells the sun to get up.

Chuck Norris once stitched up a cut in his arm with a spoon.

There are 5 known levels of Super-Saiyan. Achieving the 6th level is known as "Going Chuck Norris."