Chuck Norris invented the printing press by putting two pieces of blank paper together.
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Chuck Norris can make a dog bark the alphabet, in spanish, backwards.
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Chuck Norris can play the saxophone... while holding his breath.
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Chuck Norris can freeze water using a toaster.
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King Kong climbed the Empire State Building because Chuck Norris was waiting at the bottom.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why George Michael is never gonna dance again.
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What happens when Chuck Norris orders a beer and gets a beer?
He roundhouses the waitress, Chuck Norris should not have to ask.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
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Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin... that he built with his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
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The last thing that you see before you die, is Chuck Norris.
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