Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick with his arms.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
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Bullets dodge Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and as he enters, notices a horse and the end of the bar with a sign on it.
Out of curiosity, he approaches the bartender and asks what the deal is with the horse at the end of the bar.
The bartender tells him: "The sign says if you can make the horse laugh you'll win $50. Take note though that hundreds of people have tried and no-one has been able to do it."
"Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back."
So he walks to the end of the bar, whispers something into the horse's ear, and within seconds the horse is laughing hysterically.
"That's amazing," said the bartender.
"Tell you what, if you can make him cry I'll double your winnings."
"Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back."
So Chuck walked again over to the horse, came back to the bartender 2 minutes later, and the horse was balling and sobbing like a baby.
"Well," replied Chuck Norris, "First I told him a had a bigger d*ck than he did. Then I showed him."
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When you google up Chuck Norris, he googles you back for revenge.
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2 > 1... unless that 1 is Chuck Norris.
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A lion once put his head inside the mouth of Chuck Norris.
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It takes courage to say YES at the altar.
It takes even more courage to say NO to Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris was born, the only person crying was the doctor.
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Chuck Norris once joined the Army.
That's how the motto, "An Army of One" was created.
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Chuck norris can kick you in the back of your face.
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