Chuck Norris can bend light with a roundhouse kick.
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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"Between a rock and a hard place" refers to Chuck Norris' fists.
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Chuck Norris can put 13 eggs in a dozen carton.
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Obama's health care plan won't cover injuries caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face.
Nobody would survive anyway.
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Chuck Norris paints little red wagons for a living with his victim's blood.
But not the wheels.
That's just wrong.
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Chuck Norris hates both the player and the game.
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Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
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Chuck Norris had his first job as a paperboy.
"There were no survivors."
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There's a medical term for those who willingly defy Chuck Norris... organ donors.
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Chuck Norris can one hit kill a creeper in Minecraft... With a stick.
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