Chuck Norris likes steel wool... it's his loofah.
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Chuck Norris doesn't run for President; the President runs for Vice God Chuck Norris.
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If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results.
It just doesn't happen.
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Chuck Norris once made an omelette from a Fabergé egg.
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Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
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Chuck Norris's sign language is heard around the world.
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Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast.
They taste like chicken.
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Chuck Norris adds Facebook as a friend.
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Santa Claus goes to the mall to sit on Chuck Norris' lap.
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Chuck Norris shot a man to death with an unloaded nerf gun.
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Aliens fear that Chuck Norris might abduct them.
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