Chuck Norris likes steel wool... it's his loofah.
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Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact?
A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
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Once visiting Arizona, Chuck Norris spat on the ground.
The place is now known as the meteor crater.
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Chuck Norris can have his cake and eat yours too.
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Chuck actually died four years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
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Chuck Norris jokes are a oxymoron because Chuck Norris isn't a joke.
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The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second.
It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.
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Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
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Chuck Norris found Nemo with his eyes closed.
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Chuck Norris dosn't need a gun, he points an says pow!
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Chuck Norris never has a deja vu.
No scene would be that stupid to appear in front of the man twice.
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