Joke #9848

Someone tried to stab Chuck Norris in the stomach, and the knife bent on his rock-hard abs.
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If Chuck Norris was on Minute to Win it, they would need 59 seconds of filler.
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If, by some incredible space-time parodox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.
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Chuck Norris can check out books from the Library of Congress.
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For Chuck Norris, there is no such thing as gambling. He already knows the outcome.
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Never ask Chuck Norris for an autograph. Why? Because Chuck's signature is a straight roundhouse kick to the face.
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Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
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In a fight between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris would win. No questions.
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If Charlie Sheen is winning, it's only because Chuck Norris isn't playing.
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Chuck Norris once went to Stevie Wonders concerts and smiled at him; Stevie Wonder is now blind.
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Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
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