Joke #9848

Someone tried to stab Chuck Norris in the stomach, and the knife bent on his rock-hard abs.
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James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator. However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
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The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.
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Chuck Norris can smell sound and hear touch.
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Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
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Superman got his powers when Chuck Norris sneezed on him.
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Racehorses have to pee like Chuck Norris.
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The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town. They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
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Chuck Norris gave birth to himself because nobody else is capable (or could even live) to give birth to Chuck Norris.
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In a fight with the drill sergeant from "Full Metal Jacket," I'm afraid Chuck would gracefully decline to fight.
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