Chuck Norris can punch your thoughts and give you a headache.
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Chuck Norris won the World Horseshoe Pitching Contest while they were still attached to a Clydesdale.
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Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom.
Because he never f*cks up.
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Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs.
Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.
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The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
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Water needs safety arm bands when swimming with Chuck Norris.
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Once, Chuck Norris told Nike to "just do it..." and it did.
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Chuck Norris tangled with Wolverine.
He beat to him to a bloody pulp, then dared him to heal himself.
Wolverine will not be in the next X-Men movie.
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There is no such things as a tornado.
Just Chuck Norris proving that ballet ain't that hard.
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There is no such thing as an endangered species, they are Chuck's likes and dislikes.
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Chuck Norris invented hot sauce.
To put on his peppers.
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