When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer.
You will score a 1600.
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Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
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When chuck Norris was in school, he made his PE teacher run laps.
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They once had a showing of Walker Texas Ranger in 3D.
There where no survivors.
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Each hair on Chuck Norris' beard holds the soul of a victim.
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Chuck Norris is so powerful that when he goes fishing, the fish are so scared they drown.
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Chuck Norris can find Osama Bin Laden!
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There is no backspace button on Chuck Norris' keyboard.
Chuck Norris never makes mistakes.
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In the late 80's When Michael Jackson first met Chuck Norris he turned white.
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A watched kettle never boils... unless Chuck Norris is doing the watching, in which case it explodes.
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Local mountain lions have been complaining about the recent string of Chuck Norris attacks.
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