Peter: Why was the Olympian not able to listen to music?
Matthew: Why?
Peter: Because he broke the record!
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Why couldn't Usain Bolt listen to his music?
"Because he broke the record."
Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year.
In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.
Oh, you play racquetball?
You must be extremely athletic.
So I heard the reason Usain Bolt is so fast is because his offseason training consists of going back home and hitting on dudes.
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Q: Why can't skeletons play music at a church?
A: They have no organs.
Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris:
I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours.
Can you?
Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?
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What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from Grandma have in common?
You don't look down.
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Billy: "I was playing basketball and an Asian crossed me."
Mark: "Haha, how does an Asian cross you?"
Billy: "Because he crosses multiplies."
Chuck Norris created Heavy Metal when he was upset.
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Q: Why can't orphans play baseball?
A: They don't know where home is.
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