"Let bygones be bygones" is always subject to Chuck Norris' approval.
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Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.
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Jurrasic Park is a second name for Chuck Norris' backyard.
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Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter.
He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
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Chuck Norris didn't survive the first night in Minecraft, the first night survived Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris does not wear a condom.
Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
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He opens the door then turns the handle.
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The best part of waking up is not the Folgers in your cup, it's knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
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Chuck Norris once gave a cop a ticket for speeding.
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Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
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While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.
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