Chuck Norris doesn't tell lies. He changes facts.
Kids dream about having superpowers. Superpowers dream about having Chuck Norris.
Some people wear Superman Underwear, Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear. On the other hand, Chuck Norris wears no underwear.
Keep your friends close, and your enemies close to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once squeezed an M&M so hard that it turned into a Skittle.
Chuck Norris once gave a man the Hiemlich Manuever. That man still holds the record for most bones broken.
The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is CN-. These are also Chuck Norris' initials. This is not a coincidence.
You can lead a horse to water, but Chuck Norris can make it drink.
Arnold Schwarzenegger cannot tell Chuck Norris to "get down!"
The true reason why the Nazi's lost the war was because they stopped trying after they found out Chuck Norris had a summer home in Russia.