Chuck Norris talks in my sleep.
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Before America can declare war, congress has to ask Chuck Norris.
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Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
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To run away from Chuck Norris man invented a car, then to catch them Chuck Norris invented crashes.
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Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
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Chuck Norris can shoot around a corner.
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When Chuck Norris steals a car he forces it to start.
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Chuck Norris can strike the same lightning twice.
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Chuck Norris is the only person who can kick someone in the back of the face.
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Meteors didn't kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just needed a new pair of boots.
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Stevie Wonder was the last person to stare Chuck Norris directly in the eyes...
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