James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator.
However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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Chuck Norris can cut a saw with a wood board.
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Chuck Norris has 2 kids.
We know them as Pain and Suffering.
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AIDS Can't Kill Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris won American Idol, only using sign language.
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Chuck Norris killed the devil and is selling his own line of Picks of Destiny, available in all Chuck Norris approved guitar shops.
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There's a medical term for those who willingly defy Chuck Norris... organ donors.
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If Chuck Norris told you to jump off a bridge, would you?
Of course you would.
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Chuck Norris once went to practice his golf swing at a driving range... his golf balls are now known as stars!
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Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom.
Because he never f*cks up.
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Osama Bin Laden is hiding from Chuck Norris.
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