Joke #3444

How is a man like a microwave oven? Just another thing that heats up instantly and goes off in twenty seconds.
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There once was a fellow from Kent Who had such a long instrument. To stay out of trouble He folded it double. And instead of coming he went.
Vote: has 69.05 % from 6 votes. Send joke:
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When a woman gets a vibrator, it's seen as a bit of naughty fun. But when a guy orders a 240 volt Fuckmaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6 speed pulsating pussy, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collecting tray, together with optional built-in realistic orgasm scream 7.1 sound system, he's called a pervert.
Vote: has 83.54 % from 112 votes. Send joke:
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Single women claim that all the good men are married, while all married women complain about their lousy husbands. This confirms that there is no such thing as a good man. This confirms too, that women are always confused and don't know what they want.
Vote: has 74.14 % from 36 votes. Send joke:
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Q: How does a man show he is planning for the future? A: He buys two cases of beer.
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Q: Why did they make glow in the dark condoms? A: So gay guys can play star wars.
Vote: has 74.08 % from 74 votes. Send joke:
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Why are men like laxatives? They can irritate the s**t out of you.
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Two guys die in a car accident and an angel descends from heaven. "I am to give you your wings so you can fly to heaven. But if you think one dirty thought or act out one dirty act your wings will fall off." So they fly to heaven without any trouble but when they get there the first guy sees a naked woman walk by so his wings falll off. When he bends over to pick them up the second guy's wings fall off.
Vote: has 74.14 % from 36 votes. Send joke:
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Men have two emotions: hungry and horny. So if you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
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Why don't women blink during foreplay? They don't have time.
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A guy sits down at the bar and orders drink after drink rapidly. “Is everything okay, pal?”, the bartender asks. “My wife and I got into a fight and she said she isn’t talking to me for a month!”. Trying to put a positive spin on things, the bartender says, “Well, maybe that’s kind of a good thing. You know, a little peace and quiet?” “Yeah. But today is the last day”.
Vote: has 74.78 % from 37 votes. Send joke:
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