The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
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During the Vietnam War, Chuck Norris allowed himself to be captured.
For torture, they made him eat his own entrails.
He asked for seconds.
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There is no backspace button on Chuck Norris' keyboard.
Chuck Norris never makes mistakes.
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The Tower of Pisa was in Chuck Norris' way.
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Chuck Norris does not need to freeze water to make ice, he just stares at water and scares it stiff.
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There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
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In France, Chuck Norris accidentally won Tour de France by exercise bike.
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Q: What do a bungee jump cord and a hooker have in common?
A: If the rubber breaks you're screwed.
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Shhhhh...
Did you hear that?
Chuck did.
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If Chuck Norris replaced Roy Scheider, the movie would have been known as Broken Jaws, and would have only lasted 12 minutes.
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Chuck Norris isn't just a name, it's a cause of death.
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