Joke #3738

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
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Chuck Norris doesn't check the time - he decides it.
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Ali Baba said "Open sesame" to open the secret entrance to the treasure, but little did he know that saying "Open Chuck Norris" opens all doors.
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Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
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Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.
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Chuck Norris can light the contents of the Windows recycle bin on fire.
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Chuck Norris can fly a submarine.
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Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.
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Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys. The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore. The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out." The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth." Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
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When Chuck Norris visits Europe on vacation, France surrenders.
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Chuck Norris protects his airbag in an accident.
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