If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you.
If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
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Chuck Norris can drive to the moon... on foot.
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The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
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Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with fourteen times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer.
This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.
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Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris has proven Newton's third law of physics, there is no force equal to a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
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Think of the hottest woman.
Chuck Norris did her.
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Chuck Norris has his own protien powder.
The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.
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The earth doesn't revolve around the sun.
It's the sun that revolves around Chuck Norris.
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Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
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Chuck Norris doesn't Tivo television programs.
They come on when HE wants them to.
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