If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you.
If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
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Chuck Norris helps little old ladies cross the street...
Bad guys get kicked to the curb!
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Chuck Norris can sit in the shade...in an open field.
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When Chuck Norris goes to the gym the treadmill sweats.
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Chuck Norris once slapped a man into next week.
The man was missing for four and a half years.
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Chuck Norris shaves with a hunting knife.
"Shaving" consists of cutting a new mouth-hole every morning.
That's how tough his beard is.
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Chuck Norris doesn't compete, he wins.
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Evolution ended the day Chuck Norris was born.
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When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.
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Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same.
Nature knows perfection when she sees it.
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Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.
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