If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
Chuck Norris was the reason the Titanic sank. The iceberg was just a cover-up.
What came first, the chicken or the egg? Chuck Norris came first.
Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
Chuck Norris bunked school one day. Till today that day is known as Sunday.
When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.
Chuck Norris has a website, is called the internet.
When Chuck Norris gets bitten by a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
Chuch Norris doesn't make threats, he makes promises.