Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Chuck Norris throws down!
In an official mandate, 'Walker, Texas Ranger' DVD discs have been ordered to replace the armor plating in all bulletproof vests.
When Chuck Norris is in Rome, they do what he does.
Chuck Norris beat Super Mario Galaxie 2 in the big dipper... before Nintendo was invented.
Chuck Norris didn't shoot the sheriff, but he roundhouse kicked the deputy.
The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town. They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
Chuck Norris can beat everyone. Except for 1 person. Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.
Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
Chuck Norris can make a robot bleed.
Chuck Norris paints little red wagons for a living with his victim's blood. But not the wheels. That's just wrong.