Chuck Norris brings the noise AND the funk.
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Chuck Norris doesn't vote.
He elects!
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
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Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
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Chuck Norris's tears can cure every type of cancer, the only problem is he never cried.
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Bullets dodge Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can spell roundhouse kick with five letters: death.
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Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with fourteen times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer.
This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.
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Chuck Norris won more Olympic medals than the hole world...
Including himself.
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