Chuck Norris can divide by zero. 
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Chuck Norris can convert kilograms into centimeters.
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Chuck Norris CAN handle the truth.
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Chuck Norris sees dead people...and they run.
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There was no world recession, just Chuck Norris desiring a discount.
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When Chuck Norris visits Africa, the animals are required to stay in their cars.
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For fear of Chuck Norris, his shoes tie themselves.
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Q: What's the difference between Chuck Norris and a bear?
A: Chuck Norris has more chest hair.
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If Chuck Norris ran for president, the competition would drop out, and he would get infinite terms.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a theme song because, you won't hear anything once your roundhouse kicked in the face.
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Chuck Norris watched the tape from The Ring.
His phone rang and when he answered a scared voice said "Excuse me, the wrong number"
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