Joke #5318

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
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Chuck Norris doesn't get shark attacked, the shark gets Chuck Norris attacked.
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There was no Big Bang at the beginning of the Universe, Chuck Norris simply sneezed.
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When Neil Armstrong first landed on the moon he saw aliens worshiping Chuck Norris's footprints.
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Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.
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Chuck Norris once stayed at the Hotel California and was allowed to check out... and leave.
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Chuck Norris told Anne Robinson she was the weakest link and made her leave the stage.
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Chuck Norris has only played Pacman twice, and beat the game both times. The ghosts were too afraid to leave their little box to try to stop him.
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Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.
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When Chuck Norris tries to kill himself, he always dodges the killing blow 'cause he's that awesome.
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Everybody loves Raymond. Except for Chuck Norris.
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