Daylight Savings happened when Chuck Norris overslept an hour.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why there's only one airbender left.
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Chuck Norris can watch DVD's on a VCR.
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Chuck Norris's urine was the main ingredient for balco's designer steroids.
Therefore, Chuck Norris is actually the all-time single-season home run king.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a stapler, he puts the paper between his fingers and they just stick.
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Chuck Norris has counted to infinity.
Twice.
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If Chuck Norris was on Minute to Win it, they would need 59 seconds of filler.
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Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth.
Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
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Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.
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The Sun is Chuck Norris' camp fire.
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Once you pop, you just can't stop.
Unless you're Chuck Norris.
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