Daylight Savings happened when Chuck Norris overslept an hour.
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Chuck Norris never actually moves.
He merely rotates the earth with his feet.
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Chuck Norris fires Donald Trump.
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Chuck Norris hit a home run in a football game.
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When I was a kid, my Chuck Norris action figure broke all my other toys while I was at school.
When my mom tried to throw him away, he killed her.
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Chuck Norris created the Grand Canyon because he coughed "Just Once".
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Chuck Norris didn't sign the Declaration of Idependence because he wanted the British to think they had chance.
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Chuck Norris can eat the inside of an orange without peeling it.
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Chuck Norris can Do Mental Math on Paper.
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Chuck Norris's tears can cure every type of cancer, the only problem is he never cried.
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If you rate this kickass, then Chuck Norris WILL roundhouse kick Justin Bieber's ass.
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