Chuck Norris doesn't prepare dinner; dinner knows when to be ready.
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Chuck Norris donates his beard clippings to the Army so they can make Kevlar vests.
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Chuck Norris broke a mirror and got 7 years of good luck.
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Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
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Chuck Norris can stop the music.
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Chuck Norris Killed Medusa with a round house Kick.
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Once, Chuck Norris only filled his name in on the SAT.
He got a perfect score.
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Chuck Norris never uses a navigation system.
The direction he is heading is ALWAYS the right direction.
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In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself
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If Chuck Norris says his opinion on somthing, it automaticlly becomes a fact.
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Chuck Norris once had a weak moment, just to know what it felt like.
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