Chuck Norris once won a Scrabble tournament despite getting only Z's and Q's in his rack.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have to do anything for a Klondike bar.
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Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died.
The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible.
All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
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Chuck Norris saved 100% on his car insurance by switching to Geico.
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The boogie man checks his closet at night for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can eat the inside of an orange without peeling it.
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Chuck Norris can get a strike in bowling using a ping-pong ball.
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Chuck Norris runs until the Treadmill gets tired.
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Chuck Norris can turn diamonds back into coal.
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All wars stopped when Chuck Norris said, "Can I apply for the army?"
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Chuck Norris can make a turtle go faster.
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