Chuck Norris was banned from going to "housewarming" parties because he kept burning them down.
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Chuck Norris' feet are so fast, he can kick you in the past.
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When Chuck Norris punches someone in the stomach they get hit in the back of the head.
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Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
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Chuck Norris won the London Marathon in 2005 while sunbathing in California.
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When you have a question you check with Google.
When Google has a question they check with Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris has a question everybody better run!
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The only apocolypse that can happen is if bogyman insults Chuck Norris.
The whole universe goes to hell.
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Chuck Norris was once in a catch 22, but he roundhouse kicked it down to to a 12 pack and literally drank his problems away.
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Chuck Norris can drive a solar-powered car at night.
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Chuck Norris can breath out with his nose and breath in with his mouth at the same time.
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Chuck Norris bit a spider once then it became Spiderman!
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