The Earth was flat until Chuck Norris looked in it's direction...then it rolled up into a ball.
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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Chuck Norris roundhouse kick is fast that he stopped the Flash.
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Chuck Norris once got his arm stuck in a canyon.
After 5 days of pain and agony, Chuck Norris had to amputate the canyon.
It was a tough choice...
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Lactose is Chuck Norris intolerant.
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There was no Big Bang at the beginning of the Universe, Chuck Norris simply sneezed.
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Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.
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Sometimes when Chuck Norris stares at the stars too long they get scared.
These are known as black holes.
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Chuck Norris uses a stunt double during crying scenes.
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Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in 30 seconds.
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Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
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