The Earth was flat until Chuck Norris looked in it's direction...then it rolled up into a ball.
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Chuck Norris acting contracts are if the movie producer want Chuck Norris to act in his movie, the producer is roundhouse kicked.
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What time is it when Chuck Norris knocks on your door?
Too Late!
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Chuck Norris pours the milk first, then he pours the cereal.
Then he places the bowl.
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Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday.
Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
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Chuck Norris bit a spider once then it became Spiderman!
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Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg was recently hospitalize, because Chuck Norris poked him.
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Chuck Norris is so fast, he can startle his own reflection.
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If Chuck Norris were to get into a fight with another Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris would win.
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Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
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There are no bombs, Chuck Norris just jumps out of a helicopter and punches the ground.
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