Joke #6787

Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.
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Kings buy Chuck Norris size beds.
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Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
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Chuck Norris once had a pet monkey...his name was KING KONG
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Chuck Norris is what you get when you open a can of whoop-butt.
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Chuck Norris doesnt walk, the earth moves under his feet.
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Chuck Norris broke a mirror and got 7 years of good luck.
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Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
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Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
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Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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