Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold.
Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.
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Chuck Norris doesn't prepare dinner; dinner knows when to be ready.
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Cocaine is Addicted to Chuck Norris.
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Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times.
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In space Chuck Norris can hear your screams.
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If Chuck Norris were a toy, you wouldn't play with him, he'll play with you.
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April doesn't fool Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris fools April.
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When Chuck Norris has a bone to pick, it's always the jawbone.
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Chuck Norris can fly a submarine.
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When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged.
He holds up the phone and money falls out.
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The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
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