Chuck Norris doesn't cry.
His eyes sweat.
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On Halloween, children give Chuck Norris candy.
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Chuck Norris doesn't moon walk, the moon Chuck-Norris Walks.
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When Chuck Norris says 'Candyman' five times in a row, no one appears.
Candyman ain't stupid.
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When Chuck Norris has a heart attack, he attacks back.
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After Chuck Norris sweats the sweat evaporates into the sky and forms what we call lightning.
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Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
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Chuck Norris once walked in the opposite direction in the Running of the Bulls.
The bulls turned around and ran for their lives.
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In the beginning, God created light because Chuck allowed him to.
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When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.
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Chuck Norris beat the Hulk in an arm wreslting contest... with his leg.
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