Chuck Norris speaks english, french, spanish, italian and portuguese. At the same time in every sentence.
Chuck Norris was an only child. Eventually.
When Chuck Norris touched a Prius, it turned into a Ferrari
Chuck Norris's Blood Type is AK-47.
World War II started because Burger King screwed up Chuck Norris' order. Today Burger King NEVER gives you onions unless you ask for them.
Chuck Norris always knows where x is.
You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex? Because he never fucks up.
Chuck Norris once created a flamethrower by urinating into a lighter.
Chuck Norris created Heavy Metal when he was upset.
When everyone else can't, Chuck Norris CAN.
Chuck Norris is the only man to punch a cyclops between the eyes.