Chuck Norris has nicknames for his feet... Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
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When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.
The zombies do.
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Chuck Norris can win at solitaire with only 18 cards.
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Chuck Norris hates Raymond.
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Chuck Norris cannot be put in a corner.
The corner always backs away.
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Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice from a banana.
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It is believed dinosaurs are extinct due to a giant meteor.
That's true if you want to call Chuck Norris a giant meteor.
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Chuck Norris uses an air bag... in order to protect the inside of his car in case he stops too fast.
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Chuck Norris only created Russians so he can use them to take over TGI Fridays.
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Rules of fighting:
1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight.
2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
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There was once a ship that wouldn't let chuck norris on board.
It is now known as titanic
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